Angry Time (Tag;; Open)

[severus]

Severus was livid.

It was just one of those days where you either wanted to hide away and wait for it to end, or kill everyone who got in your path. Because the young potions prodigy was not quite insane enough yet to pull off the latter, he stuck with the hiding away idea.

It seemed that recently he couldn’t turn a corner without something horrible happening to him. He was starting to wonder if the entire school had gathered at some point for the single purpose of deciding in what ways each person could make his life a living hell. If he wasn’t being tormented by the Marauders, he was being chased by another band of angry Gryffindors, or he was getting into a massive fight with the only person he’s ever given a damn about. Not to mention he had nearly killed himself falling backwards down the stairs leading to the owlery. Though in truth he felt that incident justified. Saving someone’s life, or perhaps just their non-bruised flesh, was a slightly redeeming factor to an otherwise horrible day. But it wasn’t enough. Not considering he didn’t really like helping people to begin with.

He felt like a jerk who deserved what he got and a helpless victim at the same time. How was that even possible?

Continuing along his path Severus descending a staircase, his heavy footsteps starting to echo as he got deeper into the castle. He wasn’t even sure where he was going at the moment, letting anger and despair drive him to whatever location. Hopefully something secluded, where he could yell and scream and kick things around without anyone coming in to bother him.

Or where he could, you know, cry.

Long, thin fingers trailed along the cold stone wall as sluggishly ventured into the dungeons, his pace slowing as his thoughts grew more depressing. Mostly they centered around the young woman he had upset so horribly. Whatever he had been thinking when he had gone off on her, clearly it had nothing to do with getting her to forgive him. A total git. That’s what he had been to her. He stood there and chewed her out, watching her get further on the verge of crying without care. All he did was go on about how much she was twisting things around, taking absolutely no thought towards her feelings. How could he have done that?

He was supposed to care about her. One doesn’t treat a person they care about that way, no matter how pissed off they are.

An apology would be needed. Again.

If there was one thing Severus sucked at more than anything else, it was apologizing for being a jerk. After all, he lived to be a jerk. Why should he say sorry for the way he was brought up? For how he chooses to live his life? Sometimes, though, even he knew he could go too far. He was one of those people who really needed to learn to end their rants a sentence or two earlier, to prevent himself from saying something he would later regret. Apparently he still needed more practice with apologizing- he'd done it a million times already and she still wouldn't so much as look at him. He knew he was bad at it, but was he really THAT dismal?

Progressing into one of the dungeons, Severus let his eyes lift from there seemingly locked position on his feet, peering around as though he was only just finding out where he had gone. The dungeons seemed oddly fitting a place for him to spend some time. He felt like a criminal. Frustration mounted inside his stomach, churning around and producing a very sickening sensation. He couldn’t keep still, pacing back and worth across the width of the room as he deliberated on what his next course of action would be. Would things never change? Was it really time to just... start avoiding her? That's what he had been doing of late, but it seemed only effective in making his heartache worse.

Punching the wall suddenly, Severus let out an aggravated yell, much too flustered to do another other than try to beat the crap out of the stone. A part of him longed for someone to complain to, but he didn’t have a lot of friends to go running for a shoulder to cry on.

[BELLATRIX DRUELLA BLACK]

It took just about every inch of control in Bellatrix’s body to stop herself from slamming Professor McGonagall’s door on her way out. Even so, as she stormed down the Transfiguration corridor, her self-control ran out after only a few paces, and she let out a string of insults under her breath that not even she would have dared to say to McGonagall’s face. The words of the Transfiguration Professor echoed throughout her head, “disgraceful attitude . . . no respect . . . shocking act of cruelty . . . no conscience whatsoever.” And worse still, the fact that she had earned herself detentions for the next three months. Three months. The punishment was extortionate in Bellatrix’s mind, completely out of sync with the reason as to why she was being punished.

But she would admit she should have been more careful. Hexing that first year girl in an empty classroom near the staff room wasn’t the best plan she’d ever had. Or she should of at least put a silencing charm on the classroom, of course the staff where going to come running when they heard the screams. But never mind, those things were technicalities. What she didn’t understand was the length of her punishment. So the girl had needed hospital treatment, so what? It was hardly Bella’s fault that the little brat had decided to show off in front of her friends and talk back to Bellatrix. Was she supposed to stand there and take it? No, of course not.

She turned the corner and headed down the flight of stairs that would leave her to the dungeons. Her feet carried her down the familiar path to the Slytherin Common Room. Perhaps she would feel more comfortable around her fellow Slytherins, people who would completely understand why she had hexed that stupid first year. But the second she reached the stone wall that marked the entrance of the common room, her enthusiasm at the idea fell flat. She could not pinpoint the reason for the very sudden mood change, but regardless, she turned on her heel and continued down the passage that leads deeper into the dungeons.

It was noticeable colder the deeper she went into the dungeon. The silence echoed around her, the only sound was her heels on the stone floor. Not that it was unexpected. The dungeons were always empty. Partly because of the risk of running into a Slytherin down here. It was well known that this part of the dungeons was Slytherin territory and Slytherin territory only. In Bella’s opinion, if some little first year was found wandering down here after hours, well, they deserved exactly what they got.

She turned the corner, again expecting to find it deserted. Instead, she spotted Severus Snape. She spotted short, remaining where she was in the shadows. She watched him pace back and forward, obviously agitated, definitely frustrated. She didn’t know what the cause of his frustration was, but she could guess. It was either her cousin and his pathetic group of friends, or that mudblood. The former she could understand, but the latter she would never be able to be as sympathetic. She was always careful what she said about mudbloods around Severus. But her self-restraint only went so far, she had slipped up countless times in the past.

Bellatrix barely reacted as Severus punched the wall and let out a yell. The violent act didn’t affect her in the slightest, but the look on his face pulled at her heart slightly. It was a look of complete despair, utter hopelessness. She instantly knew what the cause of his anger was today. She stepped forward, making her presence know. “Severus.” She spoke softly, a rare feat in itself, but this was Severus she was talking to. There was something about him that made her unwilling to use the sarcastic, patronising tone she used on everybody else. Except when it came to the subject of the previously mentioned mudblood. But that was always going to be a different matter. “Don’t. Don’t let that mu. . . . Don’t let her get to you like this.” She’s not worth it. She’s just some filthy mudblood. But with Severus, some things were best left unsaid.

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[severus]

Severus sprang away from the wall like it had suddenly caught on fire when he heard Bellatrix’s voice break through the otherwise silent room. He hadn’t been expecting anyone in the hall, and for a moment seemed a little stunned that someone had actually shown up when he needed them to. That kind of thing seemed to only happen in movies- he was never lucky enough for it. But Bellatrix was one of the few Slytherins he felt he could trust, at least to a far greater extent than the others. She was strange and cruel, sure, but never to him. There was always something about her that made her… approachable.

It probably had a lot to do with the fact that she thought he was a pure blood, and thus someone she could spend her time with. How she would turn on him if she knew the truth! But he wasn’t in the mood to be that honest with her. At least, not that night. It was likely that she thought he was a total goober for his being actions, since it was clear she had witnessed them, and he didn’t need to make it worse by making her an enemy.

Sometimes he needed to remind himself not to do that- apparently it was very easy for him to turn good friends against him in the blink of an eye.

Sighing softly, the half blood hideaway turned slightly to face her, swallowing his heart back down after it had lodged itself in his throat from his fright. Honestly, though he was glad to see her, she might have been a bit less subtle about her entrance.

He could have wet his robes.

“…. I don’t know what you mean,” he replied after a thoughtful moment to debate his next course of action, “I’m just angry because Slughorn gave me a lower mark on an assignment then I deserve.”

Probably the weakest lie he had ever given… ever. Unfortunately, when it came to Lily Evans, it was damn near impossible for him to hide his real feelings. And Bellatrix knew him well enough, now, to know exactly when he was thinking about her. But he knew the topic was a patch of thin ice: Bellatrix had never liked muggleborns. She had probably never liked him talking with one from Gryffindor, of all places, either. So he knew he needed to be careful when he spoke about his former friend. If he wallowed too much, surely he would anger her.

And he would be down yet another friend.

So he straightened himself up a bit, offering her a faint kind of almost-smile. “I guess it’s silly to be so upset about it…” oh God, he should have picked a better damn lie. He knew he sounded like a complete idiot.

Sighing softly, he looked down at his hand, blood bubbling over a couple of his now skinned knuckles. Maybe he shouldn’t have punched a thick stone wall with his bare hand. It wasn’t like he was a particularly well-built sort. The knuckles would likely bruise and hurt, as he was about as sturdy as a peach and half as powerful as one.

“Why are you down here, anyway?” he asked after a moment, wondering if he could change the subject.

[BELLATRIX DRUELLA BLACK]

Again, Bellatrix was neither surprised nor did she react to his response as he heard her voice. It was understandable that he should be startled; after all, her entrance had been very subtle. She was getting better. But the dungeons had always been one of the only places that you could find some privacy if you so desired it, it was not the place that you expected to turn around and find someone in the same room as you. And so she made no comment on his reaction to her appearance. Under normal circumstances, she might have laughed at someone practically jumping out of their skin, but in this instance her face remained almost expressionless.

Bella raised an eyebrow as he began talking about Slughorn and his assignment. It was probably the worst excuse she had ever heard, and that was saying something. Severus was extraordinarily gifted at Potions; everybody in Hogwarts knew that unless you’d been living under a rock for the past six years. In fact, it was one of the things that had first brought Severus to Bellatrix’s attention. After hearing Slughorn boast about an extremely talented student in the year below her, well, she couldn’t help but do a little investigation of her own. And so the idea that Slughorn had gave him anything less that top marks on an assignment was ridiculous.

“Oh I see,” she started lightly, “And what was the assignment about Severus?” she pretended to ask politely. But her words were dripping with sarcasm, making it quite obvious that she knew he was lying. It was hard to pretend otherwise, his excuse had been incredibly weak. There was no doubt that he was thinking about that stupid mudblood. It seemed to be much more of a recurring theme lately, ever since the end of last term. And as much as Bella disapproved of the friendship or whatever it was they called themselves, she knew better than to criticise it in front of him. After all, with his potions and dark art skills, Severus could prove himself to be incredibly useful in the future. So perhaps it was best to keep him on her good side. And therefore the topic of ‘the potions assignment’ was left open, it was up to Severus to decide whether or not to return to it.

Her mind momentarily flicked back to annoyance as she remembered the reason she was down in the dungeons. “McGonagall’s given me detention for three months, all because I cursed some stupid little first year brat.” She replied bitterly, “It’s not like she didn’t deserve it.” The last bit was said under her breath, but in the silence of the dungeons it was quite plausible that Severus would hear.

Despite being preoccupied about her own problems, Bellatrix’s attention was still focused on Severus. It therefore, did not escape her notice when he glanced down at his injured hand. She moved towards him silently and took his hand in hers. Using her wand, she quickly healed his hand. It was something she had had a lot of practise with over the years. After all, it would do no good for a Pureblood to walk around looking anything less than best, simply because they had a bruise on their leg from falling over. And it was the same sort of principle that caused Bella to engage in this unusual act of kindness. She didn’t want a member of her house walking around looking like that. It just wasn’t acceptable. As she finished, she briefly examined her work. It wasn’t brilliant, not like the sort of Healing charms her Mother could produce, but it would do. Again, without a word, she moved back to where she had been standing previously. She didn’t expect a thank you from him in any form. In Slytherin, it just wasn’t done.

OOC: Sorry it's taken me so long to reply!!

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[severus]

Severus was glad she had allowed the other topic to slip into the conversation- he didn’t want to linger on his horrible lie when they both knew he hadn’t had any assignment to be bitter about. He wasn’t dumb enough to think she had fallen for it, especially with the tone she had used in her questioning still buzzing in his ears. No, she knew he was thinking about Lily, and that was probably a dangerous thing. Bellatrix, unlike him, had no reason to like muggle borns, and was happy to throw around the word ‘mudblood’ to describe them. If she knew he wouldn’t call Lily that again, not even in front of someone from the Black family, what would she think? That he was going soft? That he had been tainted all along? He’d been in trouble for hanging out with the Gryffindor in the past. Gotten on nerves.

He had to make sure that didn’t happen again, if only because he no longer had that Gryffindor to hang out with. Not wanting to end up completely alone, he knew he would have to avoid topics he and the other Slytherins simply didn’t see eye-to-eye on.

Thinking most Gryffindors deserved to be in the hospital wing, thankfully, was not a topic he disagreed with them on.

“I’m sure she did,” he replied, “what happened, if you don’t mind me asking?” If she needed to vent, he didn’t mind being a friendly ear- it was nice just to get away from his own problems to listen to someone else’s. She had to have been annoyed. Getting a detention from McGonagall was never fun, especially if you happened to be Slytherin. Of course Severus thought she was biased- he thought that about every teacher, save for the ones who happened to like Slytherin. Funny how that worked. Still, it wasn’t a lie- the transfiguration professor favored Gryffindors. It explained why the marauders never seemed to get in that much trouble when they did something unsavory with her near.

Little punks.

He watched as she moved forward, always a little tense when people got close to him. Normally, it meant he was going to end up in pain. However, he knew Bellatrix wouldn’t attack him for no reason, so he did his best to keep his gut reactions under wraps, watching her carefully, but with no emotion betraying his thoughts. Really, it was a little surprising. While he didn’t think she would do anything bad to him, he hardly expected her to do anything good, either. He hadn’t thought she would know healing spells- it seemed like the kind of thing someone destined to dwell in the dark arts would avoid. Still, he supposed he she had her reasons for it. Probably something that made perfect sense in Black-world, too. When it came to things like that, Severus knew it was better not to ask.

Raising his hand, he examined his knuckles, impressed with her handy work. Now he wouldn’t have to bother healing himself, or going to the hospital wing to have it dealt with properly. Good- he wasn’t great at healing himself, and he really hated the hospital wing. She had helped him out in two ways, probably without even realizing it. Three if you included the actual healing of the injury.

He offered her the slightest of half smiles before lowering his hand once more. “I didn’t know you were good at healing magic,” he commented, which was probably about as close to a thank you as possible in Severus-speak, “you’re full of surprises, aren’t you?”

[BELLATRIX DRUELLA BLACK]

In Slytherin, it was often hard to find someone that you could freely talk to. Of course, there were always dozens of people willing to listen to one another, but they tended to be seeking information they could use for their own good. It wasn’t uncommon to have a conversation with a fellow house member and have the entire school know about it the next day. At times, Slytherins could be the loyalist people in Hogwarts when it came to looking out for one another, but getting stabbed in the back by people you consider yourself close to was a frequent hazard.

Luckily, it seemed Severus was one of the few Slytherins that she could freely rant to. She had no doubt he would keep it to himself. “Some little mudblood brat decided she would be clever and talk back to me in front of her friends. So I cornered her in an empty classroom later on and cursed her.” She started, speaking rather quickly so as to let her anger out. “Turns out some Prefect heard the screams and ran to get McGonagall from the staff room. Well, you know the rest. I didn’t even leave a scratch on her!” she finished adamantly. It was quite clear she was still furious about the incident. Not only was it a major inconvenience to be stuck in detention with McGonagall for the next three months, but it was embarrassing. Extremely embarrassing. She almost dreaded the moment the rest of her house found out about this. Of course, no body would dare mock her in front of her face; this was Bellatrix Black after all. But it wouldn’t stop the snide comments and pointed fingers. The most important rule in Slytherin was if you were planning to get revenge on someone, do whatever you like, but don’t get caught.

She watched Severus’s expression curiously. The flicker of a smile that graced his lips was a clear thank you, and it was more than Bellatrix had expected. But then again, Severus was definitely considered to be more of an unusual Slytherin. “Mother always insisted I knew the basics. It’s no big deal.” She shrugged the topic off casually, she had no intention of telling him the reason she had healed his hand was to keep up appearances, she had a gut feeling he wouldn’t approve at all.

She shifted her weight onto her other leg and crossed her arms across her chest. After seven years of living in the dungeons, Bellatrix was more than used to low temperatures, but here in the deeper dungeons it was considerably colder than usual. The roaring fire in the Slytherin Common Room certainly wouldn’t have been unwelcome. “So I assume you’ve been thinking about the conversation we had a few weeks ago?” She asked, managing to make her voice sound casual. It didn’t stop her burning curiosity. A few weeks ago a conversation had started in the common room between a group of older Slytherins. The topic had been centered on their intentions to join the Dark Lord as soon as possible. With some, it was easy to see they were telling the truth. With others, it was painfully obvious they only agreed with the rest to avoid any unforeseen consequences. With Severus, Bella was never quite so sure.

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[severus]

It didn’t seem that fair to him, the potions prodigy scrunching his nose as she explained what happened. “If it didn’t leave a mark, you shouldn’t have gotten in so much trouble,” he huffed, sure that the damn Gryffindors had probably played up the situation to make sure McGonagall punished her more than she ought to have. It was just like them to do whatever possible to get a Slytherin in trouble. Of course, Severus didn’t really agree with running around cursing people just for some comment or their blood line, but that didn’t mean he found it disgusting or, in some way, criminal. It just wasn’t something he was used to doing. He felt it didn’t suit him, really, to be hurting people. Maybe because a part of him knew that it didn’t make him any better than the people who attacked him. Lily had always told him that.

But if he really had to give it a reason, he would say it was simply because he didn’t want Lily thinking he was evil. He used to have a bit of fun every once in a while, and hadn’t thought himself worse off for it, but Lily… she had looked at him like he was turning into some kind of monster. So he had done his best to keep away from the antics the rest of his house liked to engage in, only being a bit cruel to people when they were around and Lily wasn’t. Even then, he didn’t enjoy it like he used to. Damn Lily.

She was like his second conscience, picking up where the first one was clearly lax.

Evans-shaped conscience of not, Severus wasn’t exactly brimming with compassion for other people. He didn’t feel remotely sorry for the person Bellatrix had attacked, after hearing what had happened. Sounded to him like the kid really had had it coming to her.

When she brought up the conversation that had taken place in the common room, Severus offered a nod, only just managing to keep himself from frowning at the thought. Yes, he had been thinking about the conversation they’d had. The very idea of joining the Death Eaters had been keeping him up ever since then, strange dreams making it very unclear to him if he was really following the right path. With everything he had learned about them, his lack of being a pureblood, and Lily constantly reminding him that they were completely evil and not to be trusted, the eagerness he’d once had in joining them had started to waver and crumble away. It wasn’t like he no longer wanted to be a part of their group, he was just… confused. Was it really going to be so terrible if he joined them? Would he really be the monster Lily already thought he was transforming into? Just because they did some less-than-reputable things didn’t mean they weren’t doing it for a good cause. The Dark Lord just wanted to help the wizarding world, didn’t he? Purify it, as he said. Maybe it would be better if the blood lines were all strong, Severus really didn’t know. Many said The Dark Lord was just a murderer- Severus didn’t believe that. He had motive. Reason. If the ending was right, didn’t that justify the means?

Ugh, last year things had seemed a hell of a lot more simple. He had been able to make promises without worrying about them later. These were people who liked him and thought he was talented. What more reason did he need to be with them? The rest… maybe it was all just semantics.

Or maybe he was just trying to hide from the obvious truth.

“I’ve been thinking about it,” he said with a nod, “I can’t imagine anyone who hasn’t been- it’s a bit of a big deal, isn’t it? What about you? If you brought it up, you must have it on your mind quite a lot.” For all he knew, she had already joined the Dark Lord- she seemed one of the more eager potential recruits. Which made him all the more nervous about telling her that he might have been having some second thoughts at that moment.